3 months ago today, at 1:08 in the morning, we met Ryder
James Rice for the first time. My
heart still feels like it might burst when I think of that first moment I held
him in my arms. He was
perfect. He still is. Here is the story of how he came into
our lives. I tried to make this
blog post short, but couldn’t. It
was too wonderful of a day to shorten.
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| Ready to pop! (9/11/2011) |
On September 13, 2011 Jesse and I woke up knowing that on that
day (or most definitely the next) we would have a son. I had been due Sept 11th and since
Ryder didn’t show up on Patriot Day, my doctor decided she didn’t want to wait
much longer and scheduled the induction (I was a high risk pregnancy and on blood thinners). So on the
morning of September 13th we called the hospital to make sure everything was a
“go.” It was. We called our family to let them know
and we started getting ready for one of the biggest days of our lives.
We spent the morning cleaning the house (nesting instincts going strong up to the last minute), loving on Boone (poor guy didn’t know his world
was about to change forever), and writing a letter to Ryder from each of
us. Finally, we were ready. And surprisingly calm. We had been waiting for this little guy
for so long and couldn’t wait to meet him. Around noon we headed into the
hospital.
On the short drive down to Overlake Hospital in Bellevue, we
listened to the “pump up” mix we’d made (I made a “pump up” mix before I ran my
marathons, so it felt only appropriate to make a “pump up” mix before
labor).
When we got to the hospital and started going through
paperwork, the nurse told me I had to stop eating. Now if you know me, you know this was a bad idea (I get
very low blood sugar). We told the
nurse that my doctor had wanted me to eat throughout labor to keep my blood
sugar up (honest – she said it!).
The nurse then confidently informed us that in all her 10 years in labor
and delivery she had never once had a patient be allowed to eat during
labor. We asked her to call my doctor
and check. To our relief she came
back and said that sure enough, my doctor wanted me to eat. Thank goodness! I quickly sent Jesse off to the
cafeteria to load up (FREE food!
Well, kind of :-).
The nurse started the labor-inducing Pitocin and we had our
parents come into visit while it started to take effect. But there wasn’t much effect. For some reason, I had always thought I
would have a quick labor. I think
I’ve always trusted my body would know what to do. In fact, I had told my doctor that my
“birth plan” was to have a 3-hour, pain-free labor. She laughed at me.
Around 7pm on the night of my induction, my nurse informed
us that I just didn’t seem to be going into labor and that I wouldn’t have a
baby before noon the next day. I
was crushed. I had hoped to try
for a natural birth but it felt like if I was going to be laboring through the
night, I would rather have us get a little rest for when Ryder was finally born
than try to labor through the night without an epidural and be exhausted once
he showed up. So after talking
with Jesse we decided that once I started dilating I would get the
epidural. And so we waited. At around 9pm we sent our parents home
to get some rest (no point in them staying up if we weren’t going to meet our little
guy until the next day).
But what we thought was going to be a very long, slow night
took an unexpected turn. Around 10pm my water broke and things finally started moving. In fact, they started moving very quickly. Each contraction felt exponentially
more painful than the last. At
about 4cm I decided I was ready for the epidural. My nurse left to get the anesthesiologist. A few minutes later she came back and
told us that unfortunately both my doctor and the anesthesiologist had just
gone into an emergency c-section and were not available. In answer to our obvious question, she
said it would take longer to get another anesthesiologist there than to
wait. That was fine with me. Sure, I was in a horrific amount of
pain. But I could hold out. About another 10 minutes.
An HOUR AND A HALF LATER the anesthesiologist Kevin walked
in. I had never been SO happy to
see someone. My contractions had
become incredibly painful very fast and were about five seconds apart. I was miserable and could not imagine
12 more hours of torture. Kevin
(“blessed, wonderful, amazing Kevin” as I will forever think of him) did a
perfect job with the epidural (apart from dropping the needle the first
time). Soon I was in no pain at
all (but thankfully I could still feel my legs and even move them a bit).
I suddenly felt the urge to push and told my nurse as soon
as Kevin left the room. She looked
at me like I was crazy. Usually
with a first baby you dilate about 1cm per hour and you have to get to 10cm before you can push. It had only been about an hour and a half since I was at
4cm. There was no way I was ready
to push. But I asked her to check
anyways. So she did. And then she checked me again. “How dilated am I?” I asked, wondering
why she kept checking. “All the
way,” she said, looking shocked.
“You are about to have a baby, I’m going to go get the doctor. You might want to call your
family.” I had gone from 4cm to
10cm in an hour and a half without an epidural. No wonder it hurt SO MUCH!
But! Jesse and I were not prepared for this. Yes, we were thrilled. Yes, we were excited to meet our little
boy. But we had thought we still
had 12 hours left. We hadn’t watched our movies that we brought. Or read our books. We hadn’t even listened to any of the
songs on my “push playlist!”
But it was time.
Our little guy was almost here.
My OB came in and she and Jesse sat at the end of my bed
(they had discussed Jesse “catching” Ryder as long as everything went
smoothly). I pushed for 20
minutes. It was a wonderful time
of laughter and excitement, thanks to Kevin’s perfect epidural.
** SPOILER ALERT:
Before you read on, the next part of the story does involve BLOOD so
read at your own risk. **
When Ryder’s head came out the cord was wrapped around his
neck (which of course I couldn't see from my perspective). I was
looking down at Jesse and my doctor, waiting to see my son for the first time
when “POP!!!” There was a loud pop
and blood sprayed everywhere. Now
when I say everywhere, I mean everywhere.
Ceiling, walls, my OB, Jesse, me, the nurse standing 5 feet away, the
rocking chair in the corner of the room, the white blinds on the windows. Everywhere. My thought process went like this: “I’ve just exploded.
I’m going to die. No one
told me that could happen. Stupid
birth classes.” A split second
later Jesse and my doctor (who had both jumped backwards at the “pop”) started
laughing. If they were laughing, I
decided, then I probably wasn’t going to die. It turns out that when my doctor went to pull the cord over
Ryder’s head it had burst and sent blood flying around the room (it looked like
there had been a chainsaw massacre).
I guess it is pretty rare, but can happen (which I did not know). Nevertheless, Jesse caught our son and
handed him to me.
Ryder James Rice was perfect. He cried for just a bit, telling me the story of his own
trauma. Then he quickly quieted
down and just gazed at me. What
must have been going through his head?
I wish he could write down the story of that day from his perspective.
They asked Jesse if he wanted to “trim” the cord (since it
was kind of already “cut”). He did
and we then got to hold our little boy in our arms. He was here.
We had picked out the name, Ryder James, 3 years earlier on a
wedding anniversary trip. So in a
sense, we had been waiting for our Ryder for years. How wonderful to finally have him with
us.
(Sidenote: In the end my labor was almost exactly 3
hours. Just like I’d
“planned.” Although not pain-free
as I’d hoped).
The past 3 months have flown by, and yet it is hard to
remember a time when Ryder wasn’t in our life. Everything is so much richer, more colorful, and more
meaningful now that he is here.
Last night we were reading to him before bed. I know he does not understand the words or the story, but he
sure does love all the different voices his dad does as he tells it. Then we sat and watched him as he
smiled his way off to sleep. How
can you only know someone for 3 months and be so madly in love?
Everyday we discover something new about him. Something more to love. Ryder James Rice, we thank God for the
miracle of you. We thank God for
trusting us to be your parents.
And we promise to love you each and every day as your wonderful story
unfolds.